Wandering Through...

The Physics of Fan-Fic Sex

mallamun:

I. love. smut.

However, I have noticed a few… puzzling… recurrences in my preferred genre. Now, it has been scientifically proven that slash fic releases the same chemicals in the brain as eating chocolate does, and it has also been scientifically proven that chocolate releases the same chemicals in the brain as love/sex, ergo, reading fan fiction is neurologically akin to falling in love. Theoretically, you can live on slash fic without ever needing to leave the house (except to buy chocolate).

Unfortunately, there is also this little part of my brain that I have to turn off while I’m wanking to a good Sherlock/John kinkmeme entry: it’s the part of me that knows, deep down, that I’m masturbating to material written by an 8th grader.

Index

1. The Medically Worrisome Erection
2. The Magically Appearing Lube
3. The Utterly Pointless Condom
4. The Shiny, Scary Anal Sex (aka “Full Sex” or “Real Sex”)
5. The Not-So-Elusive P-Spot
6. The Esoteric Orgasm
7. That Thing He Does With His Tongue 
8. Conclusion 

Click to read!

Read More

1 day ago - 6010
Failbetter Games have a new storygame platform rising from the deep! Guys, You don’t understand how much I want to help develop/write a Fallen London type game. Like seriously. 

Failbetter Games have a new storygame platform rising from the deep!

Guys, You don’t understand how much I want to help develop/write a Fallen London type game. Like seriously. 

1 week ago

I am in a scruffy linen suit that was bought directly out of a thrift store and I am looking around the room at these impeccable human specimens feeling like a tool and thinking, ‘What am I doing here?’” laughs the actor. “I felt a strange jealousy as I was looking at their cool outfits and strapping bodies. I was purposely told not to put on muscle for the role, so I was the pipsqueak. I longed to have my cool outfit and be part of the team and that is exactly how Bruce Banner is feeling as well. I was nervous because I had a lot of long scientific dialogue. I thought I knew the scene pretty well, but standing next to Sam Jackson and all of the other actors in the cast for the first time, I just kind of fell apart for the first few takes. Thank goodness Sam made a good joke about it, which put me at ease and I was fine after that.

Mark Ruffalo on his first day with the entire cast (x)

(Source: bannerisms, via queenklu)

1 week ago - 581

(Source: llenka, via fourteenacross)

1 week ago - 2000

moriartium-formula:

slckat:

tomhiddlestonfans:

callmekitto:

sherlocksupportgroup:

 I CAN CONQUER THE WORLD, SHINING, SHIMMERING, DYING

TELL ME PRINCESS, NOW WHEN DID YOU LAST LET YOUR HEART BE RULED

TALE AS OLD AS TIME

TRUE AS TURN OF WHEEL

FREEDOM IS A LIE

BOW TO ME OR DIE

YOU WILL ALWAYS KNEEL~

EVER JUST DISDAIN

EVER WARS TO RISE

EVER HATING THOR

EVER JUST AS SURE

AS MIDGARD WILL DIE

OH GOD SOMEONE WRITE THE WHOLE SONG AND RECORD IT FOR THE LOVE OF GOD

yes please.

*searches for prince loki song again*

(Source: becausehiddles, via sevenpoints)

1 week ago - 42236

(Source: penny-hartzs, via sevenpoints)

1 week ago - 944

(via kswhateverspace)

1 week ago - 9058
So, universe, this is what I’ve been reduced to. The fat cat has been contained in this room as hazardous waste for the past few weeks. Those who don’t know, she had previously been making the whole house her litter-box. She has now become a octopus and can squeeze through the bars. We solved this by just closing the doors. The other cat is deciding to be help and ram the door open from the outside. I just spent ten minutes duct taping garbage bags over it just in case. Naked, on the floor, late at night. AND I’M POSITIVE IT WON’T ACTUALLY WORK. Fuck you cat. I love you.

So, universe, this is what I’ve been reduced to. The fat cat has been contained in this room as hazardous waste for the past few weeks. Those who don’t know, she had previously been making the whole house her litter-box. She has now become a octopus and can squeeze through the bars. We solved this by just closing the doors. The other cat is deciding to be help and ram the door open from the outside.

I just spent ten minutes duct taping garbage bags over it just in case. Naked, on the floor, late at night. AND I’M POSITIVE IT WON’T ACTUALLY WORK. Fuck you cat. I love you.

1 week ago - 1

(Source: ansera, via tokidokifish)

1 week ago - 21365
Man 1: But I'm not Gay!
Man 2: Yeah, but if you WERE. Thor or Loki?
Man 1: but I'm not!
Man 2: IRRELEVANT! THOR OR LOKI!
Man 1: honestly?
Man 2: THOR OR LOKI!
Man 1: probably Iron Man.
Man 2: SERIOUSLY? TONY STARK?
Man 1: yeah. I'd love to be Robet Downey Jr's bitch. God, that man....
Man 2: ooh I know what you mean. how would he proceed?
Man 1: well we'd be having dinner and he'd have his hand on my leg and he'd whisper in my ear and tell me exactly what he was going to do to me.
Man 2: oh yeah..
Man 1: and then his hand'd go further to the top of my leg and start grasping my-
Random Woman: EXCUSE ME THERE ARE CHILDREN ON THIS TRAIN.
*awkward silence*
Man 2: ...and you said you werent gay!
1 week ago - 35655

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